Happy Friday leaders, readers, and casual observers,
I’m not sure I love the “leaders, readers, and casual observers” style of address for you. I use it because I see everyone as having the potential to lead, figure some people are here for the anecdotes and not the application of my perspective to leadership, and some of you are meeting me for the first time. But something feels off about it; if you have any thoughts let me know.
I don’t have much for you in way of a weekly roundup, most of my thoughts from this week went into yesterday’s newsletter. But I will share a few things that have become clear this morning, as well as a few links worth checking out.
Be a Willow Tree, not a Locust.
There is a difference between placing value on something, and actually valuing it. Something I realized this morning after sleeping on a challenge a mentor gave me was that in being rigid as to how I valued something was in itself a devaluation of it.
I find great joy and excitement in research, thought, exploration, conversation: these are things that I hold in high regard that if I don’t get enough of, burn me out. The process of growing Cultivar is in and of itself, nourishing self-care.
But I haven’t been engaging with myself like that. Because of my past experiences in 9-5 type workspaces, I have been prioritizing hard boundaries between “home” and “work” in terms of schedule, but not energy and effort, and both arenas have suffered for it.
I’ve said before we need to relearn many lessons throughout our life - I am no exception. Despite my repetition of process over procedure, I’ve been treating my growth and business development as a procedure of things to follow rather than an exploration.
But thanks to community, I’m back on the path. I wouldn’t have caught this otherwise.
If you are feeling burned out, imbalanced, inauthentic, or any of the related emotions, find a way out of your head.
Reach out to someone, go for a walk, dive into a book or video game, get off your phone.
Find and engage with something real versus the internal assumptions you are in conversation with.
You might discover you aren’t valuing your values.
Seed Catalog:
I’ll write more about this musician later (I see a lot of applicable leadership lessons in his music), but a song that always serves as a good reminder for me is “Hi Ren” by Ren Gill. I’d highly encourage a listen, and if possible watch the video.
Ren has an incredible story of enduring hope from his experiences with physical and mental health issues stemming from undiagnosed Lyme disease for nearly 10 years, and he channels this struggle into his music.
I want to give a shout-out to
, whom I’ve recently connected with on LinkedIn. She’s doing her part to help connect authentic people with one another on the platform, despite the algorithm's attempts to keep us apart. If you are on there, jump on this post and comment section to try and find some like-minded individuals.Thought Experiment:
I’ve come across a term recently, I’m still exploring and might write more on later, but I think would be worthwhile beforehand to bring up to you for your own thought experiments: exchange relation.
Now, the context is I’m highly interested in indigenous knowledge, belief systems, and ways of being - this term comes from the realm of animistic/shamanistic epistemology, wherein, rather than living with nature, with other people, or spirits, you live in relation to them. I think this is interesting for a few reasons, but by and large, because of the societal interest in regenerative leadership, the evidence of community as a method of empowerment and fulfillment.
The first question I have for you this week is what if, instead of seeing work, friendships, business, and leadership as anything remotely transactional, we instead saw it as an exchange relationship? Both the leader and the person led exchange something valuable to the other that constructs their worldview, role, etc.
The second question is what if you had an exchange relationship with yourself? Instead of demanding more from yourself, you offered yourself more; and rather than focusing on the high-level aspects of what and how you nourish yourself and grow, you simply just took an action of doing something that nourished yourself. Rather than being attached to the how of self-care, you opened yourself up to new avenues of growth? In turn, would that future version of yourself exchange back with you; perhaps validation?
Let me know what you come up with!
- Chris
Contour Lines is my anecdotal newsletter segment that weaves whats going on in my life with my thoughts on leadership as well as personal and organizational development.
If something resonates, subscribe, leave a comment, or reach out to chat - I always love hearing people’s stories.
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